At 75 years of age, Abram could have said, "Sorry Lord, but I am too old to move again." But instead, Abram went as the Lord directed him. Abram didn't even know where he was going. He was simply told to go...'to a land that I will show you" (the Promised Land). His obedience and trust in God earned him the name our "father in the faith". Abram would become the model of a willing spirit open to God's direction. Abram was destined to become the father of Israel, the father of a nation that would, in turn, be a light to the nations of the world. Finally, we should remember that if Abraham is our "father in the faith", Sarah is our "mother in the faith" because she also obeyed God and was open to bearing a child when she was beyond the childbearing age.

For Abraham and Sarah responding to God's call was more important than the security of place and family. When called to leave their place of security and venture out to an unknown destination, they responded with obedience. They will be forever, our role models when it comes to all the leave-takings that life asks of us.

Abraham and Sarah are also great examples of living life to the end. Yogi Berra's often quoted saying "it ain't over til it's over" applies not only to sports but to life. We are called to live life as full as we can till the end. When the end comes we are then called to let go gracefully to God.

In his book Enduring Heart-A Spirituality for the Long Haul, Wilkie Au speaks about "soulful lives". He begins by quoting Dr. Helen Greenblatt who says:

"We are finally realizing what a wonderful time it is to be a senior. Stuff is stirring. Things are brewing. When people talk about 'getting enough,' they're not just referring to sleep anymore." Then Au continues "In a recent survey of more than seven thousand older Americans, ages sixty to ninety, an overwhelming majority reported that they were more satisfied with the quality of their lives than ever before. Clearly, this satisfaction level can be attributed to medical breakthroughs that enable seniors to feel better while living longer. In general, gerontology experts believe "the trend indicates just how much senior citizens are enjoying a renewed sense of purpose-a delectation for life. They're flying into space and earning college diplomas, publishing books and exploring the Internet." Keeping up a "delectation for life" is another way of talking about "living with soul."

The following story, frequently told to illustrate the importance of making our assumptions explicit for the sake of clear communication, can also be a humorous way of showing that the struggle to live vitally and responsibly is lifelong.

Once there was a sixty-five-year-old man who went to his doctor for a routine physical. After the blood work was done, the doctor met the patient in his office to report the results.

"You're in great shape for a guy who's sixty-five years old," exclaimed the doctor, as he paged through the sheaf of computer printouts from the lab. "It must be because you either maintain a healthy, holistic regime-get your proper rest, eat healthily, and exercise regularly-or you're from good stock. How old, for example, was your father when he died?"

"And did I say my father died?" retorted the sixty-five year-old man. "actually, he's eighty-five years old and still going strong. He stays in shape by jogging and keeps active socially by being part of the local senior citizens' club."

"Ah, ah, well," stammered the doctor, "how old was your grandfather when he died?"

"And did I say my grandfather died?" the sixty-five year-old man shot back. Actually, he's 102 years old and still going strong. He doesn't run or jog anymore, but he walks briskly around the block daily and keeps up with his bridge club. He dates occasionally and, in fact, he's getting married in two weeks!"

"He is?" the unsuspecting doctor blurted out. "Why would a man who is 102 years old want to get married?"

To which the sixty-five-year-old patient responded evenly, "And did I say he wanted to?"

This joke is a lighthearted reminder of the truth that "it's not over until it's over." In some form or other, the need to remain vibrant in all aspects of our being, to stay engaged socially, and to love responsibly continues to the end if we are committed to living as fully as we can.

Getting Stuck in Life's Journey

Along life's journey, we often run into bumps in the road, sometimes big bumps. If we are unable to make our way through these bumps we become stuck, sometimes permanently. Wilkie Au gives us concrete examples of experiences in life that can cause us to get stuck.

Stuck when we let past failures, poor decisions, missed opportunities make us unforgiving of ourselves and cynical about life.

Stuck when we hang on to resentments toward those who have wronged us and let these resentments chain us to frustrating relationships.

Stuck when we let ill-health and the normal aches and pains of growing old make us crabby and less appreciative of the small blessings of daily life.

Stuck when we do not seek help for healing the poor images of the self resulting from childhood traumas that hamper our present lives.

Stuck when we let envy of others consume us rather than gratefully acknowledging our own blessings and developing our own gifts.

Stuck when pain and hurts from past intimate relationships keep us from being loving and vulnerable.

Stuck when fear of failure prevents us from trying new things.

Stuck when anger about past disappointments and losses shuts us off from reconciliation with a God who wants to be close to us.

Stuck when we despairingly stay in a miserable life situation because we cannot trust enough to opt for change.

Stuck when we let fear rule our lives.

How Can We Become Unstuck and Move Forward

I am no expert in this area, but I believe that the following steps could help us big time if acted on:

1) Begin to talk to someone who can listen to your pain, hurt, weakness without judging you or giving you lots of advice. The resolution to the vast majority of our problems, if not all of them, is to be found within our own hearts. Often I have come to know what I need to do by just talking out loud to another caring presence. Gandhi once said "secrecy is the enemy of freedom". By keeping our hurt and skeletons in the closet we give them all kinds of power over us. By talking out loud about them we steal most of their power.

2) Try to change what can be changed and accept what cannot be changed, at least right now. Changing what can be changed often involves changing our attitude towards stuff in our lives. Sooner or later we find out that it is not the circumstances of our lives that will do us in, but rather our attitude towards the circumstances of our lives. Often we see the truth of this saying when we see two people with pretty much the same set of circumstances (e.g. a loss of some kind), one has a positive attitude, the other has a negative attitude. Having said that, I'm well aware that having a positive attitude in some situations is a mighty challenge. Changing what can be changed may also involve reaching out for help, talking to someone, joining a support group, being proactive.

Forgiving hurts can also be a piece of changing what can be changed. Forgiveness is God's way to help us cleanse our hearts of animosity and resentments. (For concrete help with this, you can pick up at Parish Office, my four page bulletin on: Forgiving God, Others and Self). Accepting what cannot be changed, at least today, can also be a huge challenge. I'm not sure how this "accepting piece" happens, but when it happens it usually brings enormous peace. We move towards "accepting" what can't be changed by desiring. If we have no desire to accept what can't be changed, we can at least pray for the grace to accept. "Dear Jesus, you know that I have no desire to accept this situation. Soften my heart and help me to embrace this cross". If we sincerely pray this prayer over and over, we can trust that we will receive the grace. We may also need to talk to a counselor or priest about what we can do to remove the obstacles to accepting what we cannot change.

3) Count your Blessings. As the saying goes "things could always be much worse". At least this is true for the vast majority of us. We can focus on the glass that is half empty or half full.